I've come up with a new idea for social media. My concept will be titled Facadebook. I know, I know. It sounds an awful lot like Facebook, but it's WAY different.
So here's how it will work. People will create an account and add "friends" to see what they've posted. The thing about friends is that one doesn't have to know any of the people added. In fact, most people will end up with hundreds, maybe thousands of "friends," many of whom they don't like, let alone know.
But the next part is where it gets really interesting. Facadebook users will use the platform primarily for humblebragging. Now, you may not have seen this word, newly added to the dictionary, defined. It's just what it sounds like: boasting under the guise of humility. Let me give you an example. A person buys a new house in a prestigious neighborhood. He posts a picture of his mansion and writes how "blessed" he is, ostensibly to have a monthly mortgage that surpasses the gross national product of a small country. See how it works?
Another useful concept of Facadebook will be stating the obvious in a thinly disguised attempt at soliciting comments. A mother's caption to a photo of her children reads, "Love these beautiful children. So proud of them." Um, yeah. They're YOUR kids. Of course you love them. Geez. Oh, wait. This is where the "friends" are supposed to add how much THEY also love the children, and, "oh, they're so beautiful."
Lastly, Facadebook will be an excellent form of communication for members of the same household. One bride can proclaim, "Happy anniversary to the love of my life, to whom I've been married three months." Of course, the beloved doesn't have a Facadebook account, so he can't actually SEE what his wife thinks, but "friends" will all add their congratulatory remarks. To me it seems an inauspicious start to a marriage when one member of the union would rather proclaim her/his love by getting on the computer, rather than walking into the other room and sharing the moment privately.
But I could be wrong. For all I know, their lives could be really....blessed.
So here's how it will work. People will create an account and add "friends" to see what they've posted. The thing about friends is that one doesn't have to know any of the people added. In fact, most people will end up with hundreds, maybe thousands of "friends," many of whom they don't like, let alone know.
But the next part is where it gets really interesting. Facadebook users will use the platform primarily for humblebragging. Now, you may not have seen this word, newly added to the dictionary, defined. It's just what it sounds like: boasting under the guise of humility. Let me give you an example. A person buys a new house in a prestigious neighborhood. He posts a picture of his mansion and writes how "blessed" he is, ostensibly to have a monthly mortgage that surpasses the gross national product of a small country. See how it works?
Another useful concept of Facadebook will be stating the obvious in a thinly disguised attempt at soliciting comments. A mother's caption to a photo of her children reads, "Love these beautiful children. So proud of them." Um, yeah. They're YOUR kids. Of course you love them. Geez. Oh, wait. This is where the "friends" are supposed to add how much THEY also love the children, and, "oh, they're so beautiful."
Lastly, Facadebook will be an excellent form of communication for members of the same household. One bride can proclaim, "Happy anniversary to the love of my life, to whom I've been married three months." Of course, the beloved doesn't have a Facadebook account, so he can't actually SEE what his wife thinks, but "friends" will all add their congratulatory remarks. To me it seems an inauspicious start to a marriage when one member of the union would rather proclaim her/his love by getting on the computer, rather than walking into the other room and sharing the moment privately.
But I could be wrong. For all I know, their lives could be really....blessed.
You are too funny! I like your outlook. If you aren't easily offended nor faint of heart, you might enjoy Imgur.com in your spare time, of course. The comments on the pictures are the best part of the site and you would fit right in!
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